One of the biggest blessings God has given His Bride is just that – His Bride. The Body of Christ (aka the church) is such a significant gift.

As a missionary I’ve had the pleasure of living in community several different times in several very different seasons. Basically what this means is I have voluntarily moved in with a group of random individuals who have purposed their hearts and time to serve and seek the Lord in ministry. For me this has varied from an apartment in New York City to a beach house in Hawaii, and now to a dorm in California.

Living in community can bring out a lot in your heart. Whether you’re splitting two bathrooms with 12 other people, maneuvering early risers and up-all-nighters, or learning love languages, community will show you where your strengths, weaknesses, and vulnerabilities lie. It will show you in what ways you resemble Christ as well as in what areas you might could use some more Jesus. (You may think you’re a patient person until you’ve tripped over your roommate’s splayed laundry three times in the same morning!)

I’ve learned that living in community is actually one of my favorite things. It’s such a blessing to be surrounded by so many diverse people who are seeking to see God’s will on earth as it is in heaven. When we get together with the same goal of loving God and loving our neighbor, it cultivates a safe environment for inner healing, growth, and fellowship.

Right now I am in a community of passionate, godly warriors for Christ who are so quick to intercede for deliverance, so selfless to listen to a broken heart, so genuine to speak a life-giving word in a time of need. Without their love, my current season would look very different.

Not only has community been a blessing, but what an amazing gift-giver of a Father do we have?! God has so sovereignly orchestrated this perfect season and these blow-minding circumstances. These past seven weeks the Lord has gently and patiently been healing some serious wounds in my heart and breaking down strongholds the enemy started building before I was a year old. I am humbled to think that He would organize this season for me to experience inner healing and growth. I’m learning who God made me to be, what His truth is, and what lies the enemy has spoken to me that I’ve been believing and walking in.

Y’all, this process is so messy. I’m pretty sure I’ve cried more in the past seven weeks (sad and happy tears) than I have in my life. (Okay, maybe not, but there has been a lot of weeping!)

I have doubled over and sunk into the floor crying tears of laughter, unable to breathe because I accidentally stuck my hand in peanut butter. I have ugly cried a small puddle on the floor of the sanctuary because God told me that marriage is one of the gifts He is going to give me and I am worthy of that gift. I have been unable to continue my Bible study because I couldn’t stop laughing because God told me a joke about a man named Herb. I have crumbled into a ball and sobbed loudly during a dance class because God showed me a deep wound in my heart. And that’s just this morning! (Just kidding, but that really does just scratch the surface.)

The reason I’m writing this is to point out what God is emphasizing to me: the beauty of bestowing grace upon grace. 

John 1:16 says, “For from [Jesus’s] fullness we have all received, grace upon grace” (ESV). If you read this in context and study it, one thing you might find is that grace allows us to see God’s glory. John Piper puts it like this: “Grace is the supernatural power of God regenerating us and opening our blind eyes so that we can see Christ for who He really is” (sermon link here). So when you are singing about God’s amazing grace, you are singing about and celebrating the fact that God opened your eyes to see Jesus. Like Paul, the scales have been removed from our eyes (see Acts 9 and Colossians 1).

Jumping back to John 1:16 – because of Jesus, we have received grace upon grace. This means our portion of grace is being built and continued and added onto. Just imagine you’re sitting at a large banquet table and in front of you is a large portion of your favorite dessert. For me, that’d be Blue Bell Dutch Chocolate ice cream. Now imagine that you take your first bite of whatever delicious treat is there, closing your eyes to really enjoy and savor the moment. But wait – when you open your eyes, there’s another large portion of that dessert on top of your first portion! And it doesn’t stop there – every time you take a bite, the portions keep increasing. Can you imagine?!

God’s grace is like that. We get our first portion of grace, our ability to see Jesus as our Lord and Savior. I’d say that happens at the time of your initial salvation. Then as you start to walk with the Lord and seek His heart (Jeremiah 29), you receive more grace and your eyes are opened even further. God starts speaking revelations into your spirit. Scripture starts unfolding and seemingly leaping off the pages. Your distaste for sin increases as does your thirst for righteousness. You crave more and more and more of Jesus. The more your desires for Him grow, the more portions of grace you are given to satisfy those desires. It’s beautiful.

That’s one way Abba is ministering to my heart in this season. Through all the tears, laughs, attitudes, deep thoughts, awkward moments, confusion, deliverance, and everything in between, this community of believers is increasing my portion of grace. They are pouring out grace upon grace to me daily. 

Holli prayed for me after I had a breakdown in our first ballet class. Bri hugs me every time she walks into the room. Brooke and Stacie separately on the same day prayed for me without being asked when I was really wrestling with a lie from the enemy. Helen turned dinner cleanup into a trip to the water park. Sarah makes me laugh just by saying “Wow” like Owen Wilson, or by saying anything, really. Charity gives me hugs that feel like they have a mother anointing (whatever that means). Lincoln just acts like Jesus always – and teaches me the piano and ukulele. Tanner made me feel so welcomed and valued over lunch conversations. Hana helps me get more comfortable with certain love languages I’m less familiar with. Kristin unintentionally blessed me with a Disney reference while sharing words of affirmation. Jonny makes puns like he’s getting paid for it. Lara has cradled my heart and ushered in God’s presence daily. Daniel is like my long-lost Latino big brother. Nate and Leah have hearkened moment-by-moment to Holy Spirit’s guidance. Lauren has given me the best dose of girl talk at just the right moments, whether that meant relaxing in hammocks or walking laps in the parking lot. Nato wrote a song about me, and about some girl named Brittany.

These people! This community! They pray for me. They make me laugh. They are patient. They listen. They hug. They do the kitchen dance. They share. They prophesy. They just love. They love so well. I feel so safe and so loved at all times, even when the enemy is oppressing me with demonic dreams and physical pains.

Through their love they pour out grace. Through their love, I see Jesus. Everyday.

Grace upon grace.

I love the Body of Christ.