Is there anyone that fails

Is there anyone that falls

Am I the only one in church today feeling so small

‘Cause when I take a look around 

Everybody seems so strong

I know they’ll soon discover that I don’t belong 

So I tuck it all away, like everything’s okay

If I make them all believe it

Maybe I’ll believe it, too

So with a painted grin I play the part again

So everyone will see me the way that I see them 

These lyrics are from the Casting Crowns song “Stained Glass Masquerade.” When I first heard those words as a little girl, I didn’t quite understand what they meant. Now, probably around 15 years later, I don’t question what these lyrics mean at all, because they explain exactly how I have felt. 

The basis of these lyrics, this blog post, and what God has most recently taught me is: Christians should not pretend to be perfect.

I’ll say it again. Christians should not pretend to be perfect. Here are a few reasons why:

1. It would hurt believers.

If you are a believer, you are probably familiar with Romans 3:23, which says that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. In other words, nobody is perfect. Here recently, I have been battling a few things such as loneliness, depression, and lust. Since I live on my own, it’s easy to fall into temptation. I have been seeking accountability in a variety of ways, but I still keep falling back into sin. The enemy whispers in my ear and tells me that I am the worst and lowest Christian, nobody will want me for a wife, and my friends would be ashamed of knowing me if they saw the depths of my sin. Satan reminds me of these things to shackle me into condemnation so that I won’t share my burdens with my fellow believers. His lies can be pretty believable sometimes. 

Fortunately, when God made me, He put my heart on my sleeve (metaphorically). I can’t keep things to myself, so regardless of Satan’s lies, I share my heart. 

For example, during our Sunday evening class before regular Sunday night service, I shared my most recent testimony with three other young adult women. I poured my heart out as concisely as I could (I only had an hour to share, after all), and I braced for their responses. After spinning a tale of rejecting God, running to idolatry, wallowing in lust, declaring a lack of faith, returning to God as a last resort, forsaking God again, and bearing the weights of discouragement, abandonment, and shame, I looked around the table to see what these other ladies might think. These are the thoughts that ran through my mind: 

“What are they going to think?”

“Now they know how black my heart is.”

“They’re so much closer to God than I am; they probably think I’m such a weak Christian.”

“I doubt they struggle with faith – or anything, for that matter.”

If these godly women chose to pretend like they were perfect in that moment after I shared my fears, doubts, and struggles, I would have felt so discouraged, rejected, and unloved.

2. It would hurt nonbelievers.

Let me pause that story for just a moment and tell you another one. 

Last fall, my pastor, assistant pastor, assistant pastor’s girlfriend (now his wife), a few other church members, and I would drive in our church van once a week to the neighboring towns to witness. Basically, we would drive until we found people (which would end up being on the road, at a store, at a house, in a hospital, in an apartment complex, etc.), and then we would stop to talk to them. The conversations varied, but for every person we basically tried to communicate with love, find out if they knew Jesus, and invite them to church. 

During one of these trips, we saw a woman on the side of the road. Immediately our pastor told us to stop so we could talk to her. We pulled to the side of the road, climbed out, and approached the young woman. I don’t know how the others felt, but I was at a loss for words. How could we strike up a warm and friendly conversation with this hesitant and nervous woman?

The Lord, of course, had that taken care of. My pastor recognized her from a church event that happened several years ago in another town. Right away, in his friendly and godly manner, my pastor started talking to this woman. We learned that she was in her early 20s, had a few children, and was living a hard life. Straightforwardly, my pastor asked the woman, “Are you on drugs?”

This questioned stunned me, so I can only imagine how she felt. To my surprise, though, she wasn’t offended. With tears in her eyes and a humbleness that would break your heart, she nodded and replied, “Yes, sir.”

If this godly man and the group of believers with him decided in this moment to pretend to be perfect after this woman opened herself up to complete vulnerability and judgment, she would have no doubt felt discouraged, rejected, and unloved.

3. It is unbiblical

Let me pause that story, too. 

Both of these stories could end in various ways. If the Christians in question chose to pretend to be perfect, they would contradict the Bible and negate everything it stands for. 

Paul addresses this in his teachings. For example, in 2 Corinthians 12, starting in verse 5, Paul explains that his goal is to boast in his infirmities (or weaknesses) so that Jesus’s strength gets all of the glory. How many public figures do you know who will brag about his/her failures/shortcomings?

The people I can name who do make their imperfections known are men and women of God who recognize that their sole purpose on Earth is to give God all of the glory. 

This notion is reiterated in a passage that is often taken out of context: Paul’s letter to the Philippians. In Chapter 4, Paul explains that he has learned to be content in all circumstances (in hunger, in fullness, in prison, in freedom, etc.) because of Christ’s strength. God showed Paul that he could be content in all situations, because, regardless of the details, Paul existed solely to glorify God. It didn’t matter if he was struggling – his struggles only brought more glory to his Savior and Redeemer. 

This leaves us with a choice, with the same choice the Christians in both stories I mentioned earlier faced. Will we pretend to be perfect and cover up our struggles just to protect our reputations?

Thankfully, the Christians in my stories walk like Jesus and Paul walked. In other words, they weren’t afraid to call attention to their shortcomings so that God could get the glory. 

The ladies I poured my heart out to responded with encouragement, kindness, and love. One friend had gone through a situation similar to the one I had just described, and her testimony lifted the burden of loneliness from my shoulders. Not only that, but her testimony of how she struggled (and how Jesus gave her strength to overcome) gave me hope – the cure for depression.

Likewise, after the woman on the street confessed that she was involved with drugs, my pastor responded with the same encouragement, kindness, and love. He shared how, through the power of Jesus, he overcame his own addiction to alcohol. He prayed with her and invited her to church, where he continued to extend that same love and grace Jesus shows him. 

This is one of those lessons God has taught and will continue to teach me over and over again: we were made to bring God glory, even if that means sharing about the sins we struggle with. I pray that if ever you feel lonely in your sin, don’t get discouraged from wrestling with that thorn in your flesh. Rather, follow Paul’s example and be open about your struggles. You never know who might be struggling with the same thing; someone could benefit from your testimony. 

“And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” (‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭12‬:‭9‬ KJV)